The power of connection

Last week I got to observe, first-hand the impact of our phones on parenting.

I was a couple of seats away from a toddler and mother. The child was being pretty well behaved while being as demanding as would be expected.

They were on rear facing seats, so I could see them interacting.

The mother was pointing out of the window and responding to her child's  need for connection, until she picked up her phone.

The toddler soon realised that they were not getting the same amount of response and attention and started patting their mums chest and trying to crawl into her lap.

The mother seemed to be reading and responding to a text, and was willing to put it aside while she reengaged and again pointed out of the window. While the local cows kept her child's attention she finished the text and put the phone away.

Shortly afterwards, having moved away from the cows, the child wanted the phone. The mother gave it to them, but had first switched it off, declaring that it was not working at the moment.

Overall, I think the mother did a great job. She was on her phone for a minimum of time, but even so, you could see the worry the lack of eye contact, and her slack face, had on the child.

When talking to others in person, your face remains animated, and your eyes are quick to flick to and from your child.

When you are looking and scrolling on your phone, your face is likely to go slack and expressionless, and your narrowed vision makes it harder to continue to scan and connect with your child.

I know there are parents out there who feel that being on their phones while their children are playing is all good, but I strongly suggest filming your child’s reaction when you are.

Parenting is a hard job, it is one which requires focus. It is so easy for a quick scroll to lead to a 30 minute social media swipe session.

Leave the swiping to your child's snooze time and enjoy the peace of mind that having a mobile phone brings during the others.

Talk to people on it, but don’t focus on it.

Life with a little one goes far too quickly to miss it in favour of a cute kitten falling off a window ledge!

Have you ever noticed the slack face response people have when on social media?